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 BelindaMost birthmother testimonials are written a few weeks after the adoption; this one comes 18 years later. With a possible reunion with my daughter on the horizon, I look back at the adoption process and review the following questions. Why adoption? I suppose all decisions to place a child stem from not being able to provide for them – whether emotionally, financially, physically, etc. But, why did I choose adoption? Actually, I think it chose me. Being pregnant, unwed, unemployed and not part of a religious community left me feeling hopeless. I spent months avoiding the situation and hiding the obvious as if it would go away. The father, who I was no longer with, wanted the pregnancy terminated, and having no other plan, I agreed. I thank God daily that Carolyn and her agency were presented to me first, and like sunlight flooding a dark room, suddenly I was empowered; I had a choice; I was in control. How was I treated during the process? I was treated very well and quite respectfully. Medical, financial and legal concerns were addressed, but more importantly, I had access to a wonderful counselor who supported my decision of adoptive parents (who, by the way, still send letters and pictures), and my counselor helped me sort and process my feelings. I shall always be grateful for her. Finally, was adoption the right decision? Yes – absolutely! My daughter has grown up in a two parent, God based, loving, and financially stable, happy home – one that 18 years ago I could not offer nor fathom. True, my life and circumstances have changed and I would welcome my daughter anytime, but 18 years ago I could not tell the future; I had no crystal ball, so I made a GREAT decision based on what I knew at the time – that I loved my daughter enough to let her go. Previous page: Laura R. and Trevor B. |